Gary sat back on the toilet lid and opened his phone with the solemnity of a man about to ruin his own evening.

He typed: swollen gum severe pain fever tooth

The internet responded enthusiastically.

Within seconds, he was staring at phrases like “systemic infection,” “sepsis,” and “seek immediate medical attention.” None of which were followed by the comforting words “probably fine.”

Gary scrolled faster, desperately hunting for a reassuring outlier. Something like “this happens all the time, have a cup of tea.” Instead, he found photos. He should not have found photos.

He locked the phone and dropped it onto the sink like it had bitten him.

Right. So. That wasn’t great.

His reflection stared back at him, eyes a little wider now. He felt warm. Or maybe that was the bathroom light. Or the infection. Hard to tell.

He could ignore it. People ignored worse things all the time. Wars. Climate change. Instructions on shampoo bottles. Or he could do something proactive—something distracting. Something involving noise, alcohol, and the faint hope of a dentist-shaped miracle.

The pub loomed large in his mind. Bright lights. Cold beer. The possibility of being mistaken for charming.

Gary grabbed his jacket.

What does Gary do?

Ignore the warnings and hope for the best → Page 18

Decide the pub is a better place to die → Page 13